Fucked up Memories…

You try to wake up. But your body is stubborn so is your mind. You decide to sleep in. your mind has gone numb and shut all the doors. You sleep all day. You try to think, some thought, any thought, but you cannot. You wonder whether these are symptoms of insanity. You try to remember what happened last night.
It is not the first time. Your mind tells you. Finally some thought, you feel relieved. You remember how many times your heart was broken. You remember all the tears and excruciating pain. You wonder, why do you not feeling anything this time.
You go to work. At work, people talk, you do not hear. They look at you with surprised looks. You excuse yourself and try to recollect your scattered thoughts. You look at your hand, where there was a ring, from the person whom you are not supposed to think anymore. (You decide to call that person as X.) you wonder whether X is happy now. You wonder is this what X wanted. You wonder whether X loved you for real, then you remember all those loving gestures.
Those are no recent memories, your mind has a point. All were memories of once upon a time. You try to recall when did X said “I love you”. You cannot recall. You always say that. You wonder whether X misses you. How easy to fight together rather than leaving the other half and act as a heartless brute. But you never made the choice.
It was what X wanted.




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