I will wait, as always…

I am not going above you and dictating terms in our relationship but you tend to think so. It is 2.40am and I cannot sleep. We fight a lot. Almost everyday. You misunderstand me and I am over possessive. I hate that and you know it well. I want things to be easy but how can it be when you think I use you till I find a bigger and better catch. It disgusts me. You and me, we were together for almost six years now. I had to escape from the suffocation but that did not mean I have failed you. I am not gallivanting with another and I am definitely not enjoying my life here and I am taking one day at a time. I am torn but I will not suicide because if I do that, I will never see you. You hate me almost everyday. AlI can do is wait. Till you become you. Till you come to your senses.

I will, as I did all my life.


19th and far…(71 days away)

Today is a 19th. But for you it is 20th. We cannot celebrate our anniversary together even. You know I celebrate every 19th. What is the point of this life really?




Its been 70 days. There is a hole inside my heart and it makes me hard to breathe.


Lost faith…

You are asleep. I am awake. I am living your yesterday and you live my night to come. When can we see the sun rise and sunset together?

I really had a lot of faith in God. After I started loving you, I have not asked anything for me from God but everything for you. So either God is deaf and blind or he is testing my faith. The sad news is I have reduced to a person who start the day with tears and end in the same style. I hope God must be enjoying this show.
~ Dilly ~


64 days…

Life is canada or heaven for that matter,does not mean a thing if YOU are not hear with me. You matter to me, more than everything else.

I love you so much. Too cold. Wish you are here to hold my hand and make me warm. It is been 64 days. My life is a barren land without you.

I just miss you so much.
~ Dilly~